I have decided that April will be a hard-core writing month. I have decided to write every day. I’m going to get out of the house to write. I will shoot for two-thousand words per day. And I will make this novel happen.
My goal is to finish my first draft before the end of June.
And I am finally ready, I think, to write this novel.
In a profoundly emotional and almost spiritual way, I feel ready. I feel ready to write passionately, and viscerally. In a way that I haven’t before.
I’ve been struggling because I know that this story can’t be told without profoundly felt griefs and loves and desires and regrets, but those are things I have spent my life trying to learn ways to distance myself from. But now I feel like I’m ready to work with those emotions in ways that I’ve avoided before. Something has shifted in me this spring, and I am more deeply emotional and at the same time more centred.
And I wonder if maybe what’s been bubbling away in my chest is all this deeply felt emotion ready to be worked with – rather than anxiety or magic? I would call it ‘Purpose’, but that sounds like a terribly written Facebook motivation meme.
I had also been planning on going on a writing retreat this summer – but financially things are just piling up in such a way that it seems like I should not spend money on things like retreats.
That’s okay. I have other plans for carving out some serious writing and editing time this summer. I’ll basically just make my own writing retreat at home. Where the menu is beer and skor bites all week long and every writing session starts with belly dance.
Because that’s how you make magic.